Toon: Traffic Report

After that first week of seeing the anchors of local news programs sitting at opposite ends of their Plexiglas desk, we're now getting used to seeing at least one of them Skyping it in from home. The weathercaster's large-screen TV is devoted to a graphic of next week's high temperatures, and we get to see all the trophies the sports guy keeps behind the bar in his man cave.

Since our Domingo Mercilus couldn't manage to keep six feet from his helicopter pilot without hanging from the landing skids, he's left to stare out the front window of his home on Collier Bluff Avenue. Fortunately for anyone in Brandon and Shondra's audience who still has to get out in the world, traffic on the freeways has been substantially reduced by the local stay-at-home ordinance.

Offer void in Nebraska, Iowa, and the Dakotas.