Q Toon: Sinema Viditée

 

Democrats rejoiced in 2018 when Arizona's Kyrsten Sinema narrowly won the Senate seat vacated by Republican Jeff Flake to become the first openly bisexual senator in the United States. 

Now Sinema is one of two nominally Democratic senators double-handedly blocking President Biden's Build Back Better Bill. The other 48 Democratic senators, the Biden administration, and everyone in the press are struggling to figure out exactly what it would take to get her and West Virginia's Joe Manchin on board. 

In Manchin's case, we've pretty much figured out that he wants a bill that some theoretical Republican might vote for; which is akin to finding a steakhouse a vegan might agree to eat at, or a classical opera your four-year-old would like to sit through.

If there is something that Kyrsten Sinema would like to see stricken from or added to the bill, she is being extremely coy about making everyone else guess what it might be. A reporter in the Capitol attempted to get her to explain her position:

Q: What do you say to progressives who are frustrated they don’t know where you are?

SINEMA: “I’m in the Senate.”

Q: There are progressives in the Senate that are also frustrated they don’t know where you are either.

SINEMA: “I’m clearly right in front of the elevator.”

It's dickishness like that that gets you harassed in the rest room by frustrated former supporters.

 

Q: No, I mean, what is your position on negotiations?

SINEMA: Sitting down, usually.

Q: What is your position now?

SINEMA: I'm standing, silly. 

Q: Is there anything you would like to see in the bill?

SINEMA: Words and numbers. Charts.

Q: Can't you be serious for a moment?

SINEMA: No, I'm Kyrsten Sinema.

Q: Hold on — I'm just getting word that Susan Collins has announced that she might be persuaded to vote for the bill. I'm gonna go talk to her.

SINEMA: Wait, what? No! She can't — she can't do that!

Q: Of course she didn't. Gotcha!