2015 in Review, part 1

Proving that Christians do not have a corner on the market for loopy televangelists, a Turkish cleric claims that masturbation will result in "pregnant hands" in the afterlife:

Istanbul-based televangelist Mücahid Cihad Han [right], who is active on Twitter and has his own channel on YouTube, made the remarks on May 24 while answering questions from viewers on the 2000 TV channel.
Han initially looked puzzled when a viewer said he “kept masturbating, although he was married, and even during the Umrah”, a pilgrimage to Mecca that can be undertaken by Muslims at any time of the year, unlike the Haj which is performed in the last month of the Islamic calendar.
The televangelist claimed Islam strictly prohibited masturbation as it was a “haram” (forbidden) act, the Hurriyet Daily News reported.
“Moreover, one hadith states that those who have sexual intercourse with their hands will find their hands pregnant in the afterlife, complaining against them to God over (their) rights,” he said, referring to what he claimed was a saying of Prophet Mohammed.

So that's where the phrase "pregnant paws" comes from!