The people who file amici curia briefs for Supreme Court cases don't actually get to appear before the court -- which is kind of a shame, because it would be fun to see what the justices would say to those friends of the court.
Gene Schaerr, a former clerk to Justices Warren Burger and Antonin Scalia, filed an amicus curia brief in which he seriously claimed on behalf of "100 scholars of marriage" that if same-sex couples are allowed to marry, the result will be at least 900,000 more abortions.
Now, I admit that Mr. Schaerr did not claim that gays and lesbians are eager to exercise the right to have abortions, as I have him doing in this week's cartoon.
No, his explanation makes even less sense.
"A reduction in the opposite-sex marriage rate means an increase in the percentage of women who are unmarried and who, according to all available data, have much higher abortion rates than married women. And based on past experience, institutionalizing same-sex marriage poses an enormous risk of reduced opposite-sex marriage rates."By the same logic, having a bus system results in more car accidents, because many people who ride the bus would be people who don't have driver's licenses, and people who don't have their driver's licenses are worse drivers than people who do have licenses.
Most people avoid eating citrus fruit after brushing their teeth because citrus fruit tastes bad after minty toothpaste. People who don't eat citrus fruit run a much greater risk for scurvy than people who do. Therefore brushing one's teeth causes scurvy.
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