Q Toon: Driven to Distraction

I was halfway through inking last week's cartoon when I came up with this idea, which is not how things generally work inside this old noggin. I liked this idea better, so I held onto it and hoped that the Trumpian firehose of outrageous fuckery this week would not include something I couldn't possibly not draw about.

Florida Governor Ron DeSantis, his pet legislature, and Transportation Secretary Sean "Road Rules Real World" Duffy have all been on a tear this year destroying rainbow crosswalks and anything else painted on pavement that doesn't celebrate heterosexual cisgender white Christian males. They assure us that it has nothing whatsoever to do with discriminating against LGBTQ POC DEI FAFABs; oh, my heavens, no.

Rather, it's a matter of roadway safety. How are drivers supposed to keep their eyes on the road when they come across a blinding splash of color or a reminder that Black Lives Matter?

So over the course of several weeks in September, the Florida Department of Transportation came in the middle of the night, again and again, to sandblast painted pavement, tear up colored bricks, and leave municipalities with unsightly messes where public art once graced the roads. The state further threatened to withhold funding from any municipality that dared to repair those defaced rainbow crosswalks.

The rainbow designs may be gone, but Equality Florida sees a pattern, "This isn’t about safety. It’s a cowardly abuse of power and the latest in his campaign to ban books, whitewash history, and attack LGBTQ people."

Anyway, have yourself a happy little holiday, whatever distractions bedazzle you along your travels.

But please, unlike the drivers in today's cartoon, do try to stay on the correct side of the road.

This Week's Sneak Peek

From the pencil rough that eventually became this week's cartoon:

It bothered me that most of the editorial cartoons about the My Lai massacre that I had selected for last Saturday's Graphical History Tour seemed to excuse Lt. William Calley's role in it; so yesterday, I dug up one more cartoon taking a contrary position and added it to the others. It goes against the rules of blogging, but apparently rules don't mean anything any more.

War Crimes Edition

With self-styled Secretary of War Pete HIC!seth's Leave No Survivors rules of engagement in the present regime's gratuitous War in the Caribbean, Graphical History Tour takes a look at war crimes of the past.

"Das Ende" by Dorman H. Smith for Newspaper Enterprise Assn., ca. Dec. 1, 1945

80 years ago on November 30, a German U-boat commander and two of his subordinate officers were executed for war crimes.

It was during World War II, in the South Atlantic. The German submarine U-852 under the command of Captain Heinz-Wilhelm Eck torpedoed the Greek-flagged ship Peleus on March 13, 1944.

The submarine commander Eck feared the steamer’s debris would be observed by a passing airplane, and give enough information to Allied reconnaissance to enable it to find his ship. He therefore surfaced and attempted to have the debris field eliminated by machine-gunning and grenading it into the watery deep.

Per German rules of engagement:

No attempt of any kind should be made at rescuing members of ships sunk, and this includes picking up persons in the water and putting them in lifeboats, righting capsized lifeboats and handing over food and water. Rescue runs counter to the rudimentary demands of warfare for the destruction of enemy ships and crews … Be harsh, having in mind that the enemy takes no regard of women and children in his bombing attacks of German cities.

"Spectator" by Daniel Fitzpatrick in St. Louis Post-Dispatch, Dec. 3, 1945

The execution of Captain Heinz-Wilhelm Eck, August Hoffmann, and Walter Weisspfennig, was overshadowed by the Nuremberg trials of the Nazi high command, accused of the systematic murder of 6 million Jews, Roma, homosexuals, and Socialists.

"Nuernberg" by David Low in London Spectator, ca. Dec. 2, 1945

The Nuremberg trials came to pass because the Allies were triumphant in the War. Germans did not bring the Nazis to trial. 

Nobody was put on trial for the carpet bombing of Dresden. Or for immolating the populations of Hiroshima and Nagasaki. The rules of war were followed there.

"My Lai?" by Paul Conrad in Los Angeles Times, March 31, 1971

A generation later, in another war, the world was shocked by the March 16, 1968 massacre of hundreds of unarmed civilians by U.S. soldiers in the Vietnamese villages of My Lai and My Khe. Expecting to find a Viet Cong battalion there, two Companies of U.S. Army soldiers gang-raped, mutilated, and slaughtered women and children when they couldn't find any men of military age in the town, then burned their homes to the ground. It was the largest confirmed massacre of civilians by U.S. ground forces in the 20th Century.

"Another Victim of My Lai" by William Roberts in Cleveland Press, March 30, 1971

The massacre had been documented in horrific photographs which were printed in national newsmagazines and on television.

The My Lai Massacre was an egregious, but not isolated case, according to an October, 1968 letter from Tom Glen, a 21-year-old soldier of the 11th Light Infantry Brigade, to General Creighton Abrams:

"What has been outlined here I have seen not only in my own unit, but also in others we have worked with, and I fear it is universal. If this is indeed the case, it is a problem which cannot be overlooked, but can through a more firm implementation of the codes of MACV (Military Assistance Command Vietnam) and the Geneva Conventions, perhaps be eradicated."

"Guilty" by Don Wright in Miami News, March 30, 1971

The responsibility for the massacre was taken all the way up to an Army Lieutenant, William Calley, Jr.. Calley's court martial became national news after a whistle-blower's letter prompted Congress to open an investigation. Calley testified that he had been following orders from his superior, Captain Ernest Medina. One witness testified that Medina's orders were that "anybody that was running from us, hiding from us" was to be shot. 

"Murderer" by Leonard Borozinski in Wisconsin State Journal, March 31, 1971

Calley received a guilty verdict in March of 1971 and sentenced to life in prison; yet, as the above cartoons suggest, emerged as a sympathetic figure. He was paroled in 1974 to very little public outcry.

"Time to Come Out of Hiding" by Wally "Trog" Fawkes in Punch, London, April, 1971

Meanwhile, in separate courts martial, Captain Medina and Captain Eugene M. Kotouc were acquitted of all charges. Commanding officer of Americal Division, Major General Samuel W. Koster was charged with covering up the massacre and acquitted, but demoted to Brigadier General.

"It's Not So Difficult Once You Get the Hang of It" by Bill Sanders in Milwaukee Journal, March 31, 1971

Before moving on, we would be remiss if we did not also remember U.S. Army pilot Hugh Thompson, Jr., who landed his helicopter between the villagers and the soldiers, interrupting the slaughter and evacuating some survivors to safety.

"This in a Land Where One Humiliation Is Worth a Thousand Retributions" by Mark Streeter in Savannah Morning News, May 3, 2004

In 2004, the U.S. was embarrassed by its soldiers staffing the military prison at Abu Ghraib torturing prisoners of war. The soldiers had even posted photos on the internet of themselves humiliating naked Iraqi prisoners, chaining them like dogs, and piling them up on top of each other. The most widely circulated photo was of one hooded prisoner standing on a box with arms outstretched while hooked up to electrical wires.

Punishment was limited to the lowest level grunts.

"Chain of Command" by John Sherffius in Boulder Daily Camera, August 20, 2004

What the Dubya Bush administration learned from this fiasco was to rely more and more on outside contractors, like Blackwater, whose civilian paramilitary employees massacred 17 Iraqis at a traffic roundabout in 2007. Said employees were not invited to the Blackwater annual Christmas party that year.

Two years later, the outside firm was ArmorGroup, hired by the U.S. State Department to provide security at the American embassy in Kabul, Afghanistan. CBS broke the story that ArmorGroup guards and supervisors engaging in what can only be described as a combination of the worst fraternity hazing with spring break at Fort Lauderdale.

for Q Syndicate, Sept., 2009

Hazing victims included Afghan nationals employed at the base, according to a Sept. 1, 2009 letter from Project on Government Oversight (POGO) to Secretary of State Hillary Clinton: 

"There is also evidence that members of the guard force and their supervisors have drawn Afghan nationals into behavior forbidden for Muslims. For example, photographs show guards posing with Afghan nationals at the U.S. facility at Camp Sullivan as both the guards and nationals consume alcoholic beverages in scenes that suggest drunkenness, and one photo shows a near-naked U.S. guard who appears to have urinated on himself and splashed an Afghan national."

And again, there were plenty of photos, posted to the unit's social media page. It's always the pictures that get people into trouble.

✍

War crimes have been committed by many countries other than the United States. Is it even possible to have a crime-free war, fought strictly according to the Geneva Accords? 

Seemingly not. That, however, takes us into Current Events, which are not in our Graphical History Tour's itinerary.

Not yet, anyway.

Q Toon: Moving Right Along

With our self-styled Secretary of War ordering war crimes in the Caribbean, and the President of the United States falling asleep at a meeting called for the express purpose of finding out how deep his cabinet of ass-kissers can give him tongue, it may seem a mere distraction to focus on the Secretary of the Treasury dismissing complaints about inflation by suggesting that people in "blue" states should just move to "red" ones.

But my bailiwick is the LGBTQ+ press, and Secretary of the Treasury Scott Bessent is gay. That was my excuse for paying so much attention to the previous Secretary of Transportation, and I'm sticking to it. If the next president's Secretary of Energy is a lesbian, I'll probably have to come up with a bunch of cartoons about her, too.

Meanwhile, Mr. Bessent's advice ain't gonna do ya a heckofalotta good if you already live in a red state. And if you're a New Yorker who's fond of Ethiopian-Peruvian fusion cuisine, the most au courant Broadway extravaganzas, or having an international airport within Uber distance, you might want to reconsider relocating to Shelby, Montana.

And you might want to check out what the pay grade for your line of work is out there, too.

By the way, if inflation is making life difficult for you, I really wouldn't recommend moving to Argentina.

This Week's Sneak Peek

The Trump maladministration won't tell you, but today is World AIDS Day.

Last week's cartoon mused that Robert F. Kennedy Jr.'s Health and Human Services Department could use the occasion to spread unscientific garbage about HIV/AIDS. Instead, the State Department has issued a directive that forbids anyone in the executive branch from even mentioning World AIDS Day.

The state department has directed its employees and grant recipients not to use US government funds to mark the event – which falls annually on 1 December – and not to promote the day publicly. The news was first reported by the journalist Emily Bass and confirmed in an email viewed by the New York Times. ...

[T]hey should “refrain from publicly promoting World Aids Day through any communication channels, including social media, media engagements, speeches or other public-facing messaging”.

The email also reportedly said the government’s policy is “to refrain from messaging on any commemorative days, including World AIDS Day”, even though Donald Trump has issued proclamations for dozens of other observances, including Anti-Communism Week and National Energy Dominance Month.

As Emily Bass notes,

[U.S. Government] personnel may attend external, locally organized World AIDS Day events but may not speak at these events or promote their attendance via social media or media channels.

I suppose it's better than promoting the sort of half-baked crackpot fantasies that are the hallmark of the present regime.

But yes, Silence = Death.

Got the Kit As Well As the Kaboodle

Today's Graphical History Tour serves up some leftover turkey from Thanksgiving Day, 1925.

"Your Uncle Sam Is Good at This" by Dorman H. Smith for Newspaper Enterprise Assn., ca. Nov. 26, 1925

Editorial cartoonists greeted Thanksgiving a century ago with confidence and exuberance that the nation was awash in good times. The United States happily enjoyed peace and prosperity, even if the rest of the world was still recovering from World War I, revolting against colonial occupiers, or fighting to put down rebellious colonies.

"Some Stuffin'" by Ed Gale in Los Angeles Times, Nov. 26, 1925

Ed Gale lays out his specific ingredients for Uncle Sam's turkey stuffing. I'm not as confident as he was, however, that farmers in 1925 were enjoying prosperity as much as the auto makers, railroad barons, construction trades, and radio stations.

"Truly Thankful" by Dean O'Dell in Dayton Daily News, Nov. 26, 1925

A reader left a comment on my cartoon last week of Donald Napoleon Trump shushing Miss Columbia; she wondered when it was that the female characterization of the United States went out of fashion. That might be a topic for a future Graphical History Tour; but for now, here Columbia is settling down for Thanksgiving dinner with her male counterpart, Uncle Sam.

I was a bit surprised to come across her in Dean O’Dell’s cartoon; her star was fading by 1925. She rarely appeared in editorial cartoons any more, except at the bier of deceased presidents. 

"Uncle Sam Will Take a Little of the Stuffing" by Wm. A. Rogers in Washington Post, Nov. 26, 1925

I'm not quite as surprised to find Miss Columbia serving Thanksgiving dinner in this cartoon by William A. Rogers. This is very late in Rogers's career, which began when he succeeded Thomas Nast at Harper's Weekly in 1877, a time when Columbia was a frequent subject of editorial cartoons. (Dean O'Dell, in contrast to the 71-year-old Rogers, was 35 in 1925, ten years into a thirty-year cartooning career.)

What really separates Rogers's cartoon from the rest in today's post is how he uses the holiday occasion not to celebrate but to complain: that "Big U.S. Banker" and the European powers represented at the Locarno conference (see last Saturday's post) — even "Little Belgium" — are going to leave poor old Uncle Sam with nothing but a little of the stuffing.

Well, every party needs its pooper.

"Dr. Hoover Makes His 1925 Report" by Clifford Berryman in Washington Evening Star, Nov. 8, 1925

Just for some context, here are a couple of cartoons celebrating the heady economic news coming out of Washington D.C. Clifford Berryman's cartoon depicts Commerce Secretary Herbert Hoover delivering an excellent bill of health to Uncle Sam.

"Having the Time of His Life" by Dorman H. Smith for Newspaper Enterprise Assn., ca. Nov. 12, 1925

Neither Berryman nor Dorman Smith could know that within months of Herbert Hoover taking the presidential oath of office four years later, that crashing sound from Wall Street would hardly be music to anybody's ears.

"Let Us Repair to the Dining Room" by Bill Donahey in Cleveland Plain Dealer, Nov. 26, 1925

But we return now to Thanksgiving 1925, and the requisite eating, drinking, and being merry, for tomorrow is always a day away.

"Thanksgiving at Aunt Maria's" by Archibald Chapin for New York Tribune, Nov. 26, 1925

Archibald Chapin overloaded this cartoon with labels, and since the print is probably too small for any of you reading this on a handheld screen, I'll give you some description. Those seated around the table include "the young man from the county seat," Cousin Dottie, Grandma Wyatt, the Minister, Aunt Maria, Aunt Abbie, Uncle Ham, Cousin Stella, the minister's wife, and Uncle George. Cousin Ada's chair is empty because she's heading to the kitchen. Three children are in another doorway "waiting for the second table." I'll forgo reciting all the dishes on the table and buffet, save to note that there are turkey, ham, and oysters, and two each of cakes and pies.

Chapin's Aunt Maria is saying to The Minister on her right: "Really, Brother Stephens, I'm sorry we haven't much to eat this Thanksgiving." And I should probably point out that Aunt Maria could have been Hispanic or Italian but probably wasn't; the name is common in Scandinavian and Germanic countries as well.

Authoritative cartooning historians tell me that Chapin was employed by the Philadelphia Morning Ledger and syndicated by Ledger Syndicate in 1925, yet this cartoon and others of his that year sport copyright notices crediting the New York Tribune. My guess is that the Tribune was distributing Chapin's cartoons during the illness that kept Jay N. "Ding" Darling away from his drawing board for much of 1925 and early '26.

In conclusion, here's a cautionary tale against gluttony, even if it comes too late for anyone whose eyes were bigger than their waistlines on Thursday:

"I Warned Him His Appetite Would Be the Death of Him" by J.P. Alley in Memphis Commercial Appeal, Nov. 26, 1925

But I have to quibble with Doc Featherbones's post mortem diagnosis. It wasn't Tom's own appetite what done him in.

Do Not Adjust Your Set

How come spaceships on Star Trek only meet each other head-on, face-to-face? Someday, I'd like to see a Star Trek episode in which the Enterprise meets a ship approaching at a perpendicular angle, or even upside down.

And then when the viewscreen shows the other ship's captain and bridge crew, so are they.